remedy (noun): a medicine or therapy that cures disease or relieves pain, an act of correcting an error or fault or an evil; (verb): set straight or right, provide relief for.
As things are now so uncertain, we want something to fix this. A solution. A remedy. Something clear, obvious.
Where's the "writing on the wall"?...some TRUTH?
Give us some signs, messages, direction...we are desperate. It's probably safe to say that we want them sooner rather than later...like NOW. Is it just me?
I got up today and my inside voice emerged more loudly. The interior yearning of 'OMG, what can I do?! So here I am, talk-typing.
It's been many months now (!!) since I stepped back from my usual public/outward self (Yang) and stayed more inward (Yin) -- getting literally "sent to my room", like everyone else (stay at home, shelter in place...the new pandemic vocabulary).
For all of us, the current global pandemic - an experience so virulent - that first asked, now demands (again) for us to stay put, sit still, and go to our own homes/rooms.
A Time-OUT that is ironically Time-IN.
Sometimes, some of us see it as a relief to stop doing. Sometimes, some of us see it as punishment. Like it or not, it is like being "sent to our room" to contemplate about our behavior. (even if many of us use this time to instead think about OTHERS behavior...but that's another whole blog post)
For the first time in several generations, this isn't just happening to only a select individual, group or country. Everyone on the planet is getting this clarion call to examine what ails us.
Sometimes it feels to me like the most wonderful opportunity.
Sometimes it feels like the "uh, oh" that comes when something unseen starts to surface.
I have long been thinking it's similar to a 'boil' - some hidden "poison" that has been lying in wait, dormant. It begins to gather and accumulate where we can't see it, at the deep subtle levels. When the conditions come to trigger it, it will inevitably rise up. Eventually then, it has get out. It opens, spews. After some expression, it will close. But if the temporary opening is not complete in remedying the expulsion of what was poisonous inside, it will need to return and repeat the process.
You get it. Rich if graphic analogy, huh?
Seems that we need to not ignore, deny, suppress or lament the process.
Perhaps we can rearrange it.
What we had normally been using to conduct ourselves and our life is now impossible to keep doing. The pandemic is our chance and is our potential gift to receive.
And so I, like all of us when in our better states of mind, have been thinking: "What IS the remedy? What will make this "stop? What can I/we change?"
And, no one knows what to DO. No one trustworthy seems to have a remedy.
So, since this has now surfaced and continues to ooze out and spread in all directions, urgent questions keep coming: "What CAN I do? WHY would I do this instead of that? HOW can I make any difference in this? WHO am I, in these uncertain times?"
Oh boy, wow, I thought this morning...when suddenly I was staring straight at my own sign, literally, right there -- on the outside wall of my clinic.
The logo I chose 25 years ago to represent what I "do" for a living, tagging myself and my work...some kind of 'remedy woman' of sorts. (...in recent times, more like "out of sorts")
These chosen Chinese characters are supposed to convey the meaning (or intention) of a "Whole/Complete..or Golden Remedy".
Well, huh. How bout that.
So maybe my idea of "remedy"needs some tweaking.
Maybe we/I have it wrong. What if the so-called "normal" way of our/my doing things and the sense of who we/I are/am now demands some deep rearranging?
Yeah, I might very well know this. Most/many of us know this. And, until now, it has been less urgent to change it very much. We just want to keep on with what we thought was comfortable (enough).
What DOES it take to really join up and get myself....or everyone collectively...on board...together...at the same time to cure/heal ourselves?
I certainly like to think that I am indeed on board, on the same page as everyone else.
And then, I go outside of my little world here or listen to the news and go right back to feeling out of sorts - confused, disoriented, stuck.
It seems that it is well worth the time now to consider a different approach, a different "course of treatment", to this new, unusual, unknown situation.
Like it or not, I sat down to try and up-end my own 'normal' practice/lifestyle/mindset and to test things out maybe in reverse order.
Up until this good ole CORONA/COVID19 pandemic madness showed up, perhaps 'normal' programming has been set up like this:
WHAT: the things on my ToDo list, goals, results - what will I PRODUCE?
HOW: is it going well? does this all FUNCTION - does it work out and for how long?
WHY: is my INTENTION in sync with the impact? - what's the point?
WHO: am I? IDENTITY - what attitude, belief creates the sense of mySelf and produces the feelings that this ME has?...what internal voices or external feedback do I pay attention to, so that I can be "me"? ('I am an angry, sad, anxious, overwhelmed, disappointed, justified, satisfied, failed, inspired, discouraged, creative, hopeless person...')
So, I decided this morning to share my own experiment with you.
My personal spiritual path asserts that any change on the apparent 'outside' of us needs to start on the inside of us. (this means that we willingly look at it. We surrender to some investigation/contemplation - i.e., meditation).
I thought, 'Well, what happens if... I try out a completely different way...reversing the process?'
Like a personal 'clinical trial' - let's see what happens when I:
Identify WHO I am today, then
Know WHY this I/Me is doing whatever is on her ToDo list, so she can know
HOW it would be best to approach these things and interact with others, to then
produce WHAT may be potentially the cure or remedy to the problems now arising for this I/Me
Want to join me and try it?
It would be lovely to have you as company, especially since another stage of TIME OUT is called for.
I am off to the clinic rooms. I am seeing the sign outside and now opening again the door to the inside walls, going inside to my 'remedy rooms'. The first one has my meditation cushion. The next one, has some alchemical tools -- physical medicines.
So, it's the opposite of what has been normal for me.
FIRST, I create the self -- my WHO (IDENTITY). Then, remind myself of WHY (INTENTION): "I am here to serve others. Then, produce (HOW/FUNCTION) (WHAT) may be healing remedies.
(over time, we may realize that this process IS the remedy itself, huh?)
What's your plan? Would love to hear from you in the comments.
I am here, whether I come out to holler back at ya or not!
May you be safe, strong and inspired.
I pray that anything I do or say here reaches you in a way that offers a bit of refuge, release and renewal.
With love and gratitude,
PS: People ask me what have I been up to while my clinic has been closed. This: my online SHOP.
My deepest thanks to my relentlessly trusting and loyal friend-patients who keep offering me the chance to serve them in their health process.
Together, may we continue the ongoing process of becoming the remedy we long for.